Pipe Dreams!!!

I'm looking for a way out, it's dark with a foul stench. I can't keep my composure, My breath feels like it is stuck in my throat and i'm on the verge of suffocating. I stand still, put my head down and my hands upon them an eventually calm myself, thinking of all the good things in my life, be it something that I take for granted everyday or something that hardly happens to me, so I pack it in my memory banks for my lifetime. I Swallowed the cold hard lump of fear and worry in my throat and continued down the path, desperately searching for my way out of this nightmare! Trapped! Only one way out and praying to the heaven's above I find it.

I almost gave up on several occasions and just wanted to let my life waste away right where I stand. But my passion for life, The woman I love, my dreams and ambitions and knowing in my heart that I could not just let my feelings of desperation and fear to stop the train of success of mine and others future. It was not just about me, it was more than me. I wasn't on the path of success for just myself. I was shaken out of my thoughts by a small dim white light about 100 feet ahead of me. My heart started to beat faster and with new found zest for life. A small smile crept toward the corners of my parched lips and the sweat upon my brow intensified as my legs moved with vigor. The light got brighter and larger in size. Thoughts of what I would do to change the outcome of my life raced inside of my aching head and feelings of guilt for letting self pity trap me began to seap into my consciousness. But has the light got brighter and the hole expanded in size I exhaled those negative feelings and started to force positive thinking inside my dome instead. I was closing in on the bright light. My heart was racing, my brain was pounding with exhaustion, my breath was strangling me with every one I took. The hole is large now, a few more feet and freedom will be my friend. Still not sure how I got myself in this situation but I truly did not care. A few more feet. I was laughing maniacally now and tears where streaming down my face; rolling over the singed area where my former tears of depression past had made their marks. And Then, Success!

I made it. As my eye's adjusted to the light I could see that I was in a empty gigantic pipe, hundreds of feet in the air. Below me, a faint glimpse of water and vegetation. In front of me was about a thousand square miles of forest. How did I get here? I do not remember anything. Could I have been kidnapped. Did I come here on my own, hurt myself and gain amnesia. Not sure. You know what, it doesn't matter all that matters is getting home. The piped was set upon a huge mountain, which was very steep and surely looked unstable. I looked down at the water, it was a guarantee that if I was to jump or fall off the mountain, then I would meet death like a new neighbor next door. I started to sob. There was a slim chance I would survive heading down the mountain, but I was in much pain and knowing I would have to do some rock climbing maneuvers with no rock climbing experience frightened the hell out of me. I could just give up and fall to my death, or sit here and hope i'm rescued. I sat for a while and weighed my options, jump to my doom and say forget it all or despite the agonizing pain, no food or water, the heat and no idea what i'm doing, make my way, down the mountain. I thought about my wife and the hurt she'd feel if she knew I gave up. I thought about my passion for acting which was not really exploding at the time and I thought about my life and what I want to be remembered for. A coward or a man that continued on through all adversity and struggle. My decision was made. I would not give up, I would soldier on. Every moment was a brand new chance for redemption and success and I wanted to fulfill my vows to myself of following through to the end no matter the consequence.

I painfully got to my feet and start down the mountain. I was in charge, I owned this situation, I was gonna be victorious. Then it happened! I came to a cliff and knew I would have to climb down in order to continue. I was still about 3 or 400 feet in the air and was scared shitless. But I made my decision and was gonna live or die by it. I got to my knees and turned over on my stomach and started inching my way over the cliff. As I hung in thin air and wondering if I made the right decision, the words "keep going" popped in my head. Over and over the words slammed my cerebrum, and was getting louder in volume. I started grabbing for crevices and out put rocks. I was doing it, I was doing it!! I traveled down the face of the beast slowly but with conviction and confidence. I started feeling like I made it, I seen my wife Erin and thought about embracing her again and never letting go. I saw myself going to auditions and bringing my all and getting the parts. I saw myself promoting my films and standing on the red carpet as cameras flashed and fans screamed for my attention.

I was so enthralled in how my life would change for the better I didn't notice how I just completely missed a piece of cliff, and let my foot slip. I tried to grab out to the face of this behemoth for security but it was to late. How stupid I am. I slowly fell backwards and headed down the path of fate. I had a way's to fall but not long enough to go through all the emotions expected for an oncoming tragic situation. I tried and failed. But you know what, I didn't care. I smiled as I fell to my doom, I was no longer afraid. I did what most would not have done, and kept going through all adversity. I felt death on the back of my neck and spun my body around to see my impending fatality. I closed my eye's and let the nice breeze of a hot day in the middle of a forest hit my face with pleasure. The water rushed up from the forest floor with intensity and in my last 10 seconds I gave out a loud yell of maniacal Freedom. I slammed into the water with enough force to level a house. Darkness fell.

A sound. Man made. My eyes strained to open but blinding light shut them closed again. I was alive! The sound was so close I could reach out and touch where it was coming from. I outstretched my hand and pushed the off button on my alarm clock. What a dream, what a damn dream. It felt so real, I was there, but obviously I truly wasn't. I sat up in my bed and wiped the cold out of my eye. I looked over at my beautiful wife and kissed her gently on the forehead, I was so lucky to have her, she was the best thing that ever has and will happen to me no matter how much success I have, it would be nothing without her. I pulled back the covers. She slowly turned over and opened her eye's. "Morning baby," she let out with a groggy yawn. "Good morning lovely," I soothingly replied. The images of my dramatic dream still flashed and burned in my head. "Today is the big day, you still afraid and nervous babe?" My wife asked as she sat up and reach for my face to softly caress it. I look her in her eye's and before I spoke, thought about the dream again and everything I have learned from it. Today was a big day, It was my second call back for a co-lead role in my first major motion picture. If I did well today I would get the part and start down a new path in my film career. I gently pushed her hair out of her eye and said, "Nope, I feel great. Today is my day." She looked at me quizzically and smiled accentuating Those cute dimples. "You got this baby," she foretold. I let my mind wonder once more to the dream and then let it seap into the back of my mind, forever to be a mentor for anything I do in life from now on. I smiled at her and said, "I know babe, Your right I do."

Till next time folks, do you, enjoy yourself.

Enough is Enough of You!!!

Everybody want's to be somebody. Well, atleast the majority of us do. Some of us our blessed to know about promoting and branding ourselves. But at what cost is it to the consumer for pushing the business of, let's say Chris Singleton into their face everyday? Bombarded by my image and my plea to people to help me in the cause to become popular enough for the industry to notice. Should I calm down? Should I ask once and let that be it?

It is a known fact that if you push people to hard or keep throwing the same situation at them, they will get fed up with it. So, what's my limit? when is enough...enough? I don't want to turn people away, because i'm overbearing. But I need them to notice me. Oh, what to do? There is sometimes so much going on in commercials, advertisement, Movies with product placement...and selling the person as a brand that it makes my head spin. So I understand fully. BUT SHOULD THAT STOP ME?!! Should I just send a little message on Facebook once a month and ask people to visit a movie i'm in? Or, should I go all out and promote like crazy? Hmmmmm...

Simply answered; In this day of T.V. Commercials and advertisement there is no reason not to take full advantage and promote your brand as much as anybody else. The thing about humans is, that we can take it. We like what we like and hate the rest. A lot of times we are talked into liking something that we thought we would never even try. Promotions! This is what makes us spin. Gives us something to do, to live for, strive for. Something to sell, a dream to reach for!! If your not doing something, then your just a waste of space. Why not sell something, everyone's doing it...besides if your going to be doing something you should at least make some cash right. Ok, Ok...that's not right. If you do do something, do it cause you love doing it(HUH). Make some money though...Love doesn't pay bills...usually. Just do something!! LIVE!!!!

Whewww...sorry, I got off subject. What was I saying....oh..ok. So, Promote your self...Sell your brand!! Let the World know that you exist and you want in just like the rest of society. Cause once it's all gone, it's gone. Take advantage of this time period...I will; And I'm sure anybody other Actor will also. I will not be left behind and have Brad and Angelina soak up all the attention. No Offense to the happy couple. But it's my time to shine.

HOW CAN SAFEWAY BE UNSAFE!!!

A young man by the name of Jared Loughner, was arrested and charged with multiple counts of murder and attempted murder, for the shooting massacre that happened Saturday in Arizona inside of a Safeway supermarket. In the broad light of day, the suspect was charged for supposedly opening fire against innocent civilians as he attempted to assassinate U.S. congresswoman Gabrielle Gifford. U.S. Rep. Gifford was struck in the head leaving her in critical condition as of the latest report. Gifford was giving an impromptu conference outside of the fortune 500 chain store on the day of the shooting. Loughner for a while had been complaining on Youtube and Facebook about the government and it's officials. Classmates at the community college spoke of him as a weird young man who would repeatedly show up to class seeming to be intoxicated on stimulates. When the school suspended him until he got a mental evaluation..he declined. Gifford was not the only victim in this case, twelve people were shot, of which six people where killed, including a nine year old girl name Christina. Christina's father told CNN news that "His daughter was born on 9-11, the day the country faced another tragedy and now she was taken senselessly in another tragedy...I pray for little Christina and ask the lord to watch over her family in this tragic time; Everyone involved in the shooting where all shot By the same nine millimeter pistol that Loughner attempted to reload and fire again. But quick thinking by the customers in the store brung this drama to and end as he was tackled and wrestled to the ground while trying to reload his gun. Please take a look at the video below and other videos linked to this horrendous situation, including a 911 call (that has just been released;) Which happened at the time of the shooting. When you are finished looking at the video please continue with my thoughts on this subject.



What get's me is that guy Jared Loughner was only twenty two years old and he was already so intralled in the situation of politics that he supposedly felt the need to try an assasinate a government official. I have a lot of thought's on the government, they piss me off too, but I just don't see how your views on politics warrant's the results of such a tragic situation.
I believe that every man and woman has the right to protect his home, familly, valuables, and him/herself from viloence. So I cannot tell you I don't think that people should be aloud to carry firearms. But I do believe that it is people like this jared character that give guns a bad name. I believe people have a screwed view of why guns where invented in the first place. I knnow that during the wild west and even before that in Japan firearms where used as protection and as harmful devices in which to slay countless lives. but I do believe there are people, Myself included that know the right way touse a handgun. Sorry for going off subject but, that topic has come up in conversations with friend's. Anyway, I wonder what makes a man to that point, I mean I have been working on my attitude a long time and I've also had people all my life to say I'm unstable and crazy, but there is no thought in my big brain that could make me want to do such a thing. So, why do things like this keep happening, and why does it seem to be young men that are committing these terrible acts? Also what do you think about the gun control in this country and how do you think it can be regulated? Please comment and give your thoughts.

Thanks to Ryan a.k.a. Twiz for giving me this great idea on this blog, and for everyone who has given me an idea, I promise I will be posting them soon. Till next time...Do you, Be true and let the Hater's worry about you. Deuces!
-Quinn a.k.a. Kinfeezy

Homeless Radio Announcer Ted Williams On CBS (NEW Interview)

How do you feel now...do you have belief yet? Do you have a new outlook on life? Everything happens for a reason, but as long as you dwelling the pain worry and suffering thenyou'll never be able to let go and let god...if your not a religous person then still let go, and see when you just do your thing and quit complaining, Then everything works it self out...
-Quinn a.k.a. kinfeezy

Raw Video: Homeless Man's Voice Gets Natl Buzz

This video proves that inspiration is everywhere and if your in the need to get it...then heres something for you. Enjoy and then...

I'm Starting A New Club! It's Called, "The New Years Resolution Indian Giver's Club." Wanna Join!

10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1...Happy New Year!! This is now the time for those pesky resolutions you promised yourself last year to kick in. Me personally, I do not indulge in or condone such behavior.
It is a vagrant excuse to perform all your habits without insult one more time before the ball drops.



Watch this video! Just magical isn't it. Now tell me, at this point in the night before the clock struck twelve, was there anything in your mind at all that was saying that you truly believe the hype that your gonna give up your old habits?

I promised my girlfriend that when I turn thirty years old, I'm going to give up smoking for good. That gives me two more precious years to enjoy the cool crisp flavor of a sweet, but strong menthol. But Like I said, It gives me two years! Plenty of take-off room to fly this addiction high up into the friendly sky's, and land in the vicinity of one less nicotine fiend island.

Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of people out there who make a conscious decision to stick to the script, and they do not break their resolution vow's. Also, there are plenty of folks out there with the same frame of mind I have about setting goals that we don't want to set; They may be goals that are set out of necessity, or more convience for those around you. Like the people you love dearly and you want to make them happy. An I know you probably thought, since I made the resolution's or promises to myself, I'm not hurting anyone if I break them. I mean, I wasn't being serious anyway! I was just stating them to make myself feel better. An to look forward to a better year, and of course a better life.

Now, I'm not one to stand there and point finger's, I am talking to myself here too. Think about it, when you make a declaration of the new year about something you know in your heart that your not going to change, then you are hurting someone. YOURSELF! You are lying to yourself...and that's a no, no. You are suppose to be your own most trusted friend and loyal advisor before anyone else, except god. So why would you, myself included, lie to yourself. You may be thinking well, it's not a big deal, or your blowing this crap way out of proportion, or damn chill out, you taken this just a little to serious aren't you...nah, hell no I'm not. This is merely a conversation for your mind. Mull it over. Do you think lying to yourself should be taken seriously? I want to know.

I'll make it simple for you, if you lie to yourself about minuscule things that you don't even mean or think is a big deal...then what else are you lying or hiding from yourself? Think about it.
Sometimes it can be the small things in life that can give you the biggest meaning to it. So watch what you say, again myself included. Don't just set goals on a whim..take the time to figure out what you are ready to accomplish and if you will be strong enough to do so. Get you some running room to get started, like my thirty-years old..quit smoking goal. Embrace the outside love from family and friends, and those close to you. If you pray, then do so. If you keep failing over and over again...Then keep trying! In the words of Dory from "Finding Nemo," Just Keep Swimming...Just Keep Swimming..Swimming...

Because getting your life on the bright and successful path...now that is a very big deal.

Till next time, stay true...and always be you! Deuces!
-Quinn a.k.a. Kinfeezy